you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Randomize