he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
