White coat. Heels.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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