if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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