Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
