I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Randomize
