Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Randomize
