it was like eating out sand paper
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
