I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
