So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
