Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
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