this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
you told grandpa to call you daddy
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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