brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
