i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Randomize
