Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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