maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
