So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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