yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
its not stalking. its research.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
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