I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
