What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
