So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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