I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
