It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
