Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
