Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i think i scared a bird with my dick
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
