I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
