yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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