he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
