My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
