so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
