she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
