Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
What a dumb baby whore.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
