Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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