I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
nutella sex= disaster
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
