you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
