I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
