Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
