I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
