Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
