I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
