idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
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