i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
