yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
