i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
