Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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