Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
