we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize