youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
You ruined the universe
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
