If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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