you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
